Helena & Valentine's Commendable Adventure
by dontcryMasha
Summary: A real hum-dinger of a x-over! Near the end of the movie, Helena and Valentine find themselves in "The Land of Things That Will Never Be", where they meet a good handful of new faces and plot to leave. But why are they there?


**Helena and Valentine's Commendatory Adventures**

_"It's over...she won..."_

"Helena?" The masked man called out into the darkness. "Helena?"

"Valentine, where are you?"

"Emmm..." Pitch blackness surrounded them both. "That's a _very _good question."

"I'm going to try and move." Helena put her hand out in front of her, saw nothing, and groped at what seemed to be the ground. "There's something flat here. Some sort of surface."

"Ohh I think I've found that, too." Valentine said.

They both crawled about the mysterious ground until they met.

"This is you, right?" Valentine asked.

"If this is you, yes." Helena said. They embraced. "Where are we?"

"Maybe this is where _she _was before." Valentine suggested. Helena shuddered at the thought of living there.

"There's nothing here." She said.

"Well, let's try to move."

Just as they tried to stand up, a light blinked in the distance. The ground illuminated briefly.

"What was that?" Valentine whispered.

"I don't know...but..." Helena stayed quiet. "Do you hear that?"

Skazhi, zachem Ya zhdu zvonka?

Zachem nemiye ablaka

Plyvut ko mne izdaleka

I tayut!

"It's music!" Valentine shouted. The light blinked once more. "There are people over there singing!"

The two people got to there kneeds and ran toward the fickering light. Soon, the darkness around them dissolved into a dreary gray, and it was apparent that they were standing in a very lonely city. Before them, two young girls in identical school girl outfits stood, arm in arm.

Zachem lyubov kosnulas nas?

Zachem Ya plachu vpervui raz?

Zachem hochy tebya, seichas?

Nye znayu!

The redheaded girl sang beautifully to the short haired one. They embraced silently.

"Hello?" Helena asked nervously. "Who are you?"

"And where are we?" Valentine added.

"We are t.A.T.u." The redhead spoke with a heavy Russian accent.

"This is land of Things that will Never be." The other one followed.

"Never be?" Helena asked.

"Yes." The dark haired girl began. "When we go to public that we are not lesbians, our souls come here."

"So...Hmmm..." Valentine seemed confused. "Two others of you exist?"

"It is dream land, here." The dark haired girl said.

"Is there a way out?" Helena asked. She looked at the smooth, faceless buildings around them.

"We do not know." The redhead replied. "We have never tried."

"You want to meet rest of people here?" The other girl asked, unusually happy.

"Why not?" Valentine said with a smile.

"Well I am Lena." the redhead said.

"And I Yulya."

The two girls took Valentine and Helena through the empty city. The buildings were very tall, and very round. They had several small windows each. They stopped at one of the identical buildings, which seemed to go on for miles, and the girls turned around.

"This is home." Yulya said, holding Lena's hand tightly. "We live here. Come in please!"

They followed the Russian girls up a windy set of stairs until they reach a door near the top.

"Come in please!" Yulya repeated, slightly out of breath. Inside the door was a rickety apartment, full of old furniture. It smelled like moth balls. Three people were seated inside.

"We have new people today." Said Yulya.

"Here is Romeo i Juliet. They are still alive." Lena said, pointing to the happy couple on the beated sofa. "And this is Eowyn, unmarried."

"Nice to meet you all." Helena said. The three people all said hello.

"So do any of you know how to leave here?" Valentine asked. Juliet looked at Romeo in disbelief.

"_Did he_?" She asked. Romeo nodded, then Eowyn stood up.

"My lord," She said to Valentine. "We do not know how to escape. Since the day we were thought up, fate brought us here."

"Well, there is _one _who may know." Romeo said softly. Juliet seemed to be scared. Lena nodded.

"There is a very smart one here." She said.

"A mastermind." Juliet said.

"A magician." Said Eowyn.

"He live in Moon Tower." Yulya added. "Big Moon Tower."

Lena lit up a cigarette and sat back on a woven arm chair.

"Nobody talks to him. He keeps to hisself." She said lazily.

Valentine looked at Helena and nodded. "Take us to him." He said.

Juliet jumped.

"No!" She yelled. "Nobody goes to see him!!!"

"Why?" Helena asked. She was shocked to see the roommates react to drastically. Romeo calmed his wife down.

"We are...in a way..." He began nervously. "Quite _scared _of him, actually."

"Is okay." Lena said, puffing on her cigarette. "We'll take you to him."


End file.
